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LETTERS TO WILBUR:

Dear Wilbur:

I came home last weekend and I found my wife in bed with our milkman. Luckily I ducked out of the way before they spotted me. How should I go about telling my wife that I know she's fooling around. I really love her and I would hate to lose her.

Dear Anonymous:

Come on guys! Can't we be a little more original with our signing names? What kind of a name is "Anonymous" to sign off with. I'll tell you what kind.... DULL!! BORING!! If I don't get some half decent letters with original signings, I might just quit. Get with it!!

Anyway, your problem is very similar to many other husbands'. You get up in the morning, you go to work and then you come home and go to sleep. It is the same old routine day after day, and to put it bluntly, its boring your wife to death. She needs some excitement in her life.

What you men need to do is surprise your wife with something new and different and maybe she'll take you back. For instance, brand a love message on the side of a cow. I've got a herd of cattle lying around that I'm finished with and I can give you a real good deal on one. You can even send her one a week if you feel really romantic. Bring home a good Holstein and I guarantee that she'll notice you. It couldn't be simpler.

Any of you other men who have the same problem, I've got lots of cows available and I'll give you a great deal. It would be even better if you buy a dozen. Great for liberated working women too.

Signed,

WILBUR