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WOODEN SHOES, WHAT NEXT?

The Dutch have always been most famous for their unusual and unique type of footwear; the wooden shoe. People all over the world are just starting to realize that hand carved wooden shoes are not such a bad idea after all. They seldom wear out, and if they are constructed properly, they can be amazingly comfortable. Another terrific advantage is that wooden shoes seldom need repairs and with the cost of leather raising almost as high as its vinyl imitations, that is perhaps the best reason of all for buying them.

Within the century, I would not be surprised if companies started marketing them in addition to their regular lines. It could become the "IN" thing very easily. Possibly the wooden idea could branch out into wooden running shoes. In fact, if the idea catches on, why stop at shoes? Surely there would be advantages in producing other wooden products like socks, or stockings which would certainly put an end to the age-old problem of sagging ankles.

The idea might spread to other totally different clothes. We would soon be able to buy wooden hats, wooden mitts, wooden ear muffs and even wooden dresses. Within the month, factories would be producing wooden bathtubs, wooden cars, wooden fireplaces and wooden basketballs. The use of steel and plastics would be drastically reduced, saving the country lots of money and oil.

So from now on, whenever you see a Dutch person, HIT HIM:

JUST LOOK AT THE MESS HE'S STARTED!